Numb

I'm not sure if the start of feeling more numb towards death of a patient is a good or a bad sign.

I thought the 2 shocks and return of spontaneous circulation would mean that he'll be all right. But suddenly, he stopped breathing and dropped his pulse.

Pulseless electrical activity (PEA)........oxygen, chest compression....asked to insert a cannula which miraculously was successful on my first try......2 minutes, still PEA.......2 minutes after....adrenaline.....

After the 3rd lot of adrenaline, he was still in PEA and the whole team agreed to stop....

I helped dress him, shut his eyes, made sure he looked decent and properly covered. All this while feeling weird that I no longer feel those heavy feelings.

Stepped into the next cubicle to help log roll a patient involved in a RTA.

I've just got to move on.